Friday, July 23, 2010

AVON Ladies Are Full of Sorcery. Fact.

One of our customers is an Avon lady. She likes to bring us her catalogs and occasionally, a free sample. The other day? She brought us exactly that. Catalogs, and a free sample. Score!

I took the pile of goodies back to the workroom, where New Person (hereafter referred to as "NP") was working. I set the stuff on the counter and opened the free sample box to see what delights it had to offer. Two kinds of face creams! Yesssss! I dug out a tiny vacuum-sealed pouch of each to take home.

Before I could stash it all in my purse? I noticed a different customer needed assistance, and went out to, you know, work. When I came back? I didn't see the freebies on the counter anymore. I started looking around, all puzzled.

Suddenly NP, who was looking through one of the catalogs, asked me: "Do you know who the Avon lady is?"

Me: "Sure, it's ________."

NP: "Have you seen her?"

Me: "Uh... yes."

Other Coworker who had joined us in the workroom: "Oh, I knew her name but I don't know who she is."

Me: "She comes in all the time."

NP: "Do y'all know..." (drops her voice to a whisper) "...she's a witch?"

Me: "Snort."

NP, all wide-eyed: "I mean, that's what somebody else told me. That she practices witchcraft."

Me, with not much conviction: "Well, I don't know. Maybe she does."

Meanwhile, I am thinking how very unlikely this is. And also? I am wondering why there is such scandalized belief that a witch might be among us. Do people really believe in witches?

I am suddenly remembering how, around the fifth grade that (awesome!) movie The Craft came out, and a friend and I went to go see it and decided it would be funny to claim that we were witches, and how it seemed to be a big deal to the other kids in our school that we might be practicing sorcery on them, and that still to this day if one of those former classmates in particular sees me, he will whisper-scream "Wiiiiiiitch!" into my ear while no one else is paying attention.

Then I reconsider. How does the Avon lady always seem to know when I am wishing for a free sample? And an entire box of said free samples completely vanished when I left them alone for five seconds. Freaky.

The verdict? Avon ladies are full of sorcery. Fact.