Your Disappointment Is Misdirected. Also Baffling.

FOUND TAPED TO A BOOK AT THE LOCAL LIBRARY:

"Dear Librarian:

Book was mutilated. 10 or 11 pages are missing.

Very disappointed."

Very disappointed. Two words. Volumes of despair.

And then? We looked to see which pages were missing... and they were all there. Did they misunderstand the story and assume that part of it had to be gone? Did it end too abruptly? Or did they tape the note to the wrong book?

WHILE WE'RE ON THE SUBJECT OF COMMUNICATING WITH NOTES, THIS COMMERCIAL IS AWESOME AND SOMEONE SHOULD TOTALLY STEAL THIS IDEA:

Post-It notes Proposal


I actually would have sworn to you that this commercial was advertising Post-It notes before I searched for it, however, everyone else who searches it on YouTube seems to think the same thing. Sorry, ad guys - that's kind of a FAIL.

OVERHEARD, WHILE SCARLETT WAS PLAYING WITH HER DUCKS IN THE BATH:

"Look at you, you've gotten all dirty again! Oh, my cuttery!"


I'M PROBABLY WAY LATE TO THIS (JUST LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE ON THE INTERNETS) BUT I LOVE IT:

Sassy Gay Friend


YOU'RE WELCOME.

Things That Are Annoying Me Right Now

1. Accordion-style Post-It notes.

Um, what exactly is the point of these? Are they supposed to be more efficient or something? Why would you want the stickum on the bottom of the note? How is it more efficient if you have to flip it around so the stickum is at the top? I don't get them. Maybe I'm overthinking - I tend to do that.

2. Noises from the apartments adjacent to ours.

The other day, I'm in the bathroom, and I start hearing this scrabbling noise. I start freaking out because it kinda sounds like little bug legs scurrying across the floor, and I'm thinking any second now a giant cockroach is going to appear and attack me. (No matter where they come from? They go straight for me. They have a vendetta.) Then? I realize the sound is coming from the apartment behind ours. Someone is digging around in their cabinets, and I can hear it through the walls.

Then I have to think about the fact that if I can hear them, they can hear me. Then I have to wonder what exactly they're hearing. Screaming matches between me and a two-year-old? Highly probable.

3. My Pizza-Face issues.

I'm sorry to keep whining about this, but the fact that I have acne like a sixteen-year-old is really bothering me, especially since when I was sixteen? My skin was awesome. Only since I started procreating has my face decided it should look like it's hosting a pepperoni family reunion. No wonder people constantly mistake me for a teenager.

There's other stuff, but if I mention it now? I'll be whining. And whining is very annoying.

On the plus side, though? Kris over at Pretty All True has given me the "Best Words Strung Together in a Comment" award for my contribution to her "Donkey Balls" post, in which I said that some people go on about IKEA as if it has beer-flavored nipples. Yay!

Don't be too jealous, y'all - you'll win something awesome one day, too. And if you go check out Pretty All True? Please come back. Because I would miss you.